Recommends #4

Monday Night Mix Tapes Recommends:

1) Holes in the Knees of Your Jeans: Holes in your jeans is a statement. It is saying, "These jeans fit perfectly and I am not giving them up, Mom. What? I look homeless? No I don't! Homeless people don't have holes in there jeans they wear sweat pants, a 'Big Johnson T-shirt', and carry an Aldi's shopping bag."
Plus, that girl you had a crush on when you were 13 totally had holes in her jeans. So that raises them up on the list. She also was smoking a really bent Marlboro Red and liked Machine Head by Bush, so that kind of hurts the whole scene these days, but the jeans part is still a good look.
Remember: When the holes in the knees of your jeans turn into more, it is time to move on. No one wants to see your whole flank. You are not a slutty female hip-hop artist.

2) Sleeping on the Couch: It kind of hurts your back, and you don't sleep very well, but there is something extremely satisfying about falling over kicking off your boots and staying the fuck there until morning. Its like saying, "Look Body, I know we have been drinking since noon, and you are worn out, but seriously, I am only doing this for you, because I am totally ready to keep partying." Also, half the time you will wake up to the dog's snoot in your grill, and that is the closest city folks can come to waking up in the wilderness- and waking up the wilderness is good for the blood.

3) Writing Letters: Receiving a letter is a treat. I know, I know - It takes longer and your spelling isn't worth shit anymore, but seriously you should do it every once in a while. I can't even remember a single telephone number I have received after 1997. All this Myspace and Gchat has kind of made us retarded. Like not, I can't take care of myself retarded - more like I don't ever write in complete sentences retarded. Also, you would never do this in a letter: :-p, lol, brb, roflmao - because that shit should be banished.